Midday snack

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I’m amazed that my dog is speaking to me.  Well, not speaking (I’m not crazy, I just fake it to get through the line at the bathroom faster) but wanting to hang with me in general.  But then again, I’m barely speaking to him.  Because he is an asshat.  I get home and immediately take him outside.  He bounds around for five seconds and I see him come back with a twig.  Looks like a twig he pulled up with dirt and roots.  But it’s not.  It’s cat shit.  My ignorant, annoying neighbors feed all the feral cats in the neighborhood, and said cats like to take a dump in our yard.  The dog found it before I did.  I went over to take it away.

Which clearly means that he HAD to have it, and ran off around the tree.  And ate it.  My dog ate feral cat shit.  Thank god he’s on a dewormer/flea combo, so I was slightly less paranoid about that.  But I got to grab the dog, NOT let him lick me as I carried him inside, dunk him under the sink while I washed off his poopy face and rinsed his mouth, then brush his teeth. Then I put him up because I’m so freaking annoyed that he ran when I told him to come, and I need to cool my jets.

And hour later, he pukes it up on the floor right next to my feet, so I get to clean him up and pick up the poop in squishy vomit form.  I have touched poop too many times today.

I told him he was a dork.

He brought me a squeeky toy.  HOW CAN I STAY MAD?!!!  Its not fair.

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11 thoughts on “Midday snack

      • the first inkling I got about the rolling was when I let my dog out to go pee in the morning while at a friends property…when he came back in…ewwwww!

    • Why, oh why, do dogs like to roll in shit? I had a dog that did that once. That was a cow pie, though. We were on a long distance car trip and stopped at a truck stop. He found a cow pie that must have come from cows in a cattle hauler. I couldn’t go near him because with my heightened sense of smell due to my pregnancy, the odor was gag inducing. My sister had to wash him off. We were in the middle of nowhere, so we had to sleep in the car that night, and he still stank, just not as bad. The next day, we went looking for a self-service pet wash in the nearest town. Couldn’t find one. Finally, we settled for a self-service car wash. I made sure he didn’t try to eat the water stuff coming out at the end, since I didn’t know if it would be toxic or not. Scrubbed him down with the brush, sprayed him off, dried him and then we had to go to a laundromat to clean all the stinky towels. Talk about irritating. But, I have to tell you that his coat was never so soft or shiny as when we washed him there!

      Ugh. Why? Why do they do that?

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