Why I Scowl At Checkout


Technology should be a thing of wonder.  If nothing else, it should work to help make our lives more effortless.  It should NOT make me want to take a bat to it with extreme prejudice.  Let’s take a look at one of my least favorite technology “tools,” the card swipe.  

First off, why does there have to be such a plethora of options?  Couldn’t the swiper use some code to decipher what you want to pay with?  Couldn’t we embed that in the cards?  Small complaint.  Hardly worth mentioning.  But…
I found this question this week, and didn’t appreciate it.  Simply because if you have to divide up your payment, I think you should go to a clerk and not use the self checkout. Because I’ve been behind people who do it, and the express self checkout becomes the purgatory checkout line.
No.  I’m not sure.  I’m simply choosing random buttons.  Even if I DID make a mistake, that’s what the cancel button is for.  Instead, you assume I’m a complete idiot that must be reminded of what I’m doing every time I check out and therefore require me to hit more buttons.
If it’s not, the machine has no good answer, and I have to talk to a person anyways.  So really, what is hitting the “no” button going to do for me that going to an actual cashier won’t?  It bugs me because this is even on the machines where there IS a person in front of me.
Sigh.  Fine.  It’s not a bad question, but…Couldn’t I just scan a coupon or something before all this mess?  I can feel my life slipping away.
For the love of pearl, NO.  Stop asking me stupid crap.  I wanna GO.
(Begin spastic eye twitch)
Finally, something useful.
Just. Get. Me. Out. Of. Here.

I really hate this whole stupid set up.  It used to be you swiped a card, put in your pin and hit ok.  Now there’s all these other questions that really make the whole process a pain.  But the worst are those swiper machines that don’t let you use a simple button.  You have to use their stupid pens that don’t write legibly, and you have to try to impale the screen to get it to actually read your choice that you tap.  And since there are a thousand questions, that’s about five thousand times I tap that stupid screen. That is my version of personal hell.


One thought on “Why I Scowl At Checkout

  1. Hilarious. There’s one bank that has this really fucking annoying thing at the ATMs – it asks you how much you want to withdraw and after, you get a window that says ‘don’t forget to collect your card before you leave’ DUH! even though most people type their code in, press ok, and then space out as they wait for cash to shoot out of the cash machine – meaning that when you look down you realise you are no closer to receiving any of your money because you forgot to press the green button one more unnecessary time. Then after you get your money you have to wait three hours for an alarm to go off loudly and some sirens to blare as it very slowly slides your card back to you. I hate that there are dumbasses in the world that necessitate this sort of lowest-common-denominator think from banks etc.

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