I actually wrote this over Thanksgiving, but I didn’t want to be a total killjoy over the holiday. So I saved all that pissy emotion for another week. A bad week. The week before finals, and therefore fits my general outlook. You are welcome.
I had a tragic thought today: smart phones = stupid people. Really stupid people. As is I saw a lady today in her car, DRIVING her car with both hands off the wheel because she was busy texting. This is the same day I heard on NPR about the genius who was so busy trying to get onto fb that she didn’t realize she walked into a NEST OF RATTLESNAKES. Luckily, they said, she was able to use her cell phone to call for help.
How about not needing to call for help in the first place?
If nothing else, this all proves Darwin was wrong. I keep seeing research that actually proves that cell phones are making young kids stupid:
Originally, Monash’s Prof. Michael Abramson wanted to explore the effects of a cell phone’s electromagnetic fields on young bodies. So, as part of his research, the professor administered tests to 317 youngsters with an average age of 13.
Overall, he found that mobile phone use was associated with faster and less accurate responses to certain cognitive tasks. Working memory was more error prone, reaction time for simple learning tasks was shorter, and accuracy was poorer in children who used their phones a lot. But when it came to word-naming tasks, these children took longer to finish them.
The results were similar for both frequent texters and callers — though the former group actually takes in less radiofrequency radiation. So that blows a hole in the electromagnetic theory. Instead, the findings seem to correlate to learned behaviors, says Abramson. In other words, he’s saying kids learned to be this way because they use cell phones a lot.
“We don’t think mobile phones are frying their brains,” says Abramson, but “if you’re used to operating in that environment and entering a couple of letters and getting the word you want, you expect everything to be like that.”
Now, my problem with this idea is the fact that most of the time, I see grown adults who are acting like asshats on cell phones. Sure, teens act like idiots on cell phones too, but I find they are more circumspect than their 30-40 year old counterparts, who assume they are the exception to the rule, whatever that rule is (being able to text and drive, being aware that no one gives a shit about your conversation and therefore you should use a lower decible, interacting with your kids in a restuarant and not just checking your lame-ass facebook status or twitter feed). The worst for me are all the morons I see holding their cell phone close to their face in the car…while their phone is set to speaker! From now on, whenever I see this I will have a new curse…that I hope they walk into a nest of rattlesnakes.